Commander Perry and Berry — We Have Tea Party!

Here’s a tea party leader person trying to be funny (and defend himself against charges of racism):

Dear Mr. Lincoln

We Colored People have taken a vote and decided that we don’t cotton to that whole emancipation thing.  Freedom means having to work for real, think for ourselves, and take consequences along with the rewards.  That is just far too much to ask of us Colored People and we demand that it stop!

In fact we held a big meeting and took a vote in Kansas City this week.  We voted to condemn a political revival of that old abolitionist spirit called the ‘tea party movement’.

The tea party position to “end the bailouts” for example is just silly.  Bailouts are just big money welfare and isn’t that what we want all Coloreds to strive for?  What kind of racist would want to end big money welfare?  What they need to do is start handing the bail outs directly to us coloreds!  Of course, the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People is the only responsible party that should be granted the right to disperse the funds.

And the ridiculous idea of “reduce[ing] the size and intrusiveness of government.”  What kind of massa would ever not want to control my life?  As Coloreds we must have somebody care for us otherwise we would be on our own, have to think for ourselves and make decisions!

The racist tea parties also demand that the government “stop the out of control spending.”  Again, they directly target Colored People.  That means we Colored People would have to compete for jobs like everybody else and that is just not right.

Perhaps the most racist point of all in the tea parties is their demand that government “stop raising our taxes.”  That is outrageous!    How will we Colored People ever get a wide screen TV in every room if non-coloreds get to keep what they earn?  Totally racist!  The tea party expects coloreds to be productive members of society?

Mr. Lincoln, you were the greatest racist ever.  We had a great gig.  Three squares, room and board, all our decisions made by the massa in the house.  Please repeal the 13th and 14th Amendments and let us get back to where we belong.

Sincerely

Precious Ben Jealous, Tom’s Nephew  National Association for the Advancement of Colored People Head Colored Person

That’s just precious. (via)

Listening to the previews of the news, it looks like they chose running a Michael Berry profile over mosquitoes biting people in Houston.  When the well is dry . . . of course financial reform passed and BP did something right today, but the local news runs with mosquitoes and Michael Berry.

(Edited for clarity.)


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5 responses to “Commander Perry and Berry — We Have Tea Party!

  1. Where the hell is this from?!?!

  2. Pretty foul stuff … they seem to take a lot of pride in being wild and leaderless (in a lard-ass, lawnchair kinda way) and hopefully their inability to regulate themselves will be their downfall … hardcore racists always seem utterly oblivious to their own stench, and the teabaggy movement is crawling with them … anyway, here’s hoping they provide us with a few more shudders and laughs before they get flushed …

  3. Thanks for saving this onto the Internets.
    Corporate News only gives snippets, if anything.
    This is what got Tea Party leader Mark Williams fired.
    He was going around saying that there was no racism in the Tea Party Movement the week he posted this.

    • You are welcome, though it seems that several others have saved it as well.

      I’m fairly weary of the whining by the Tea Party. They aren’t organic — just people who voted for McCain and are sore losers.

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